Sad News

I just found out a knitter friend of mine past away yesterday from colon cancer yesterday. She was diagnosed after having emergency surgery to remove her appendix and was pretty quiet about things at first. I remember sitting in the LYS on a knit-in night and hearing Nancy talk to another knitter, their conversation caught my attention when I heard Nancy mention cancer. I had noticed Nancy didn't seem well but no one seemed to know much.

A few months ago, my comadre told me that she had heard that treatment wasn't working and that Nancy was on pain management. Nancy made every effort to come to knit-ins (better efforts than I do and I'm healthy) and put on a smile while she was there. But you knew she was in pain and struggling.

The first time I met Nancy was probably in 2004 when CB took me to my first knit-in. I had been working on a first attempt at a blanket for my cousin's new daughter and made some horrible mistakes. Nancy sat down, analyzed it and told me that it was best to start over. She said not to worry that it happened to everyone and we pulled out the needles and started ripping back. I felt like I was a horrible, novice knitter, but had realized I was among friends.

The last time I saw Nancy was maybe a month ago. She came to a knit-in that I was at (with my comadre of course) and she looked tired and weak. We all sat around, knitted and it almost felt like Nancy was there to say good-bye. When we left I went over to Nancy, she told me to take care of myself, I told her the same and stroked her hair (which was quite thin) and squeezed her shoulder. CB and I walked out in tears and just gave each other a huge hug! CB saw her one other time, a day she brought Katharine to the shop, it was Nancy's first time meeting this beautiful little girl.

Nancy and her best friend Laurel would crack CB and I up. They were like an older version of the two of us. One blonde, one brunette. Both full of life. One married with a family, one single but with a family of friends that truly cared for her. Nancy's family didn't live in the area so her friends were her family. I can only imagine what Laurel is going through.

Nancy was supportive of everyone, knitting and otherwise. One night I was in a horrible spot and mood. Nancy asked me if I was okay and I said no. Her response was it was okay not to be okay and to go with the mood. She just got it sometimes. She would ask CB how I was doing after that and was happy to hear that I dusted myself off and am so happy and at peace now. What amazing woman...and I didn't even mention what a fantastic knitter she was!!!

I can only hope that Nancy now has the peace that she so deserves. I will miss her terribly and I know I'm not the only one. Be well dear friend...be well...

She did it!

Just wanted to give a huge shout out to Jules for getting through her entire chemo cycle! I know its wasn't an easy road, but she's done and can look forward to getting stronger and better. More treatment is coming, but right now I am so happy for her! G-d bless Jules!!!

A truly wonderful woman

I found out last night that my mom's cousin's wife passed away yesterday morning from cancer. Sydna was a intelligent, kind and successful woman, a mother of two and stepmother of two. Her two children are young, I think her son, the younger of the two, is under 10.

She was 48 years old and had been fighting cancer for at least 3 years. I saw her 2 years ago at my cousin's bar mitzvah and she was not well then, but determined to fight as hard and as long as she could.

I remember my grandma telling me how wonderful and kind Sydna was. Howie, her husband, just absolutely adored her and you could tell by the way he looked at her. Sydna was an OBGYN and considered one of the best in the area. Ironically, if I recall correctly, she had ovarian cancer.

Her funeral is tomorrow and I'm not sure I can go as it is in MA. There are services Saturday through Wednesday night which I will try to go to on Monday as I head back from NH. Just a huge loss for her family and friends and a loss of a fantastic human being. Be well Sydna...

Sad Day

I just found out that a co-worker's son passed away last night. Ben was 9 years old and had been battling Osteocarcoma for over 2 years. The cancer went away, but kept coming back. My heart is seriously breaking for this family. It just truly enfuriates me that there is childhood cancer!

Do me a favor, keep Ben and his family in your thoughts and prayers and love your family members a little more today.

I found this on Ben's website and I thought it was really meaningful (it is a quote from a child battling cancer)

“People call me a brave soldier or fierce warrior in this war on cancer. I am not the soldier, the warrior, the doctors and nurses are. I am the battlefield.”

Its October already?

Which means fall, baseball playoffs, candy corn, Halloween and Breast Cancer Awareness Month!

This is a disease that has rocked my life too many times...(chronological in order of diagnosis)

Auntie Steffi - fought and beat it twice, once when I was a teenager and the second time just a couple of years ago.

Mom - fought and beat it in 2005. Treatment took a lot out of her, but I know she was proud to consider herself a breast cancer survivor.

Naoko - fought and beat it in 2005/6 as well. She is an amazing woman who kept her battle very private, but it worked!

Randi - okay, what do you do when one of the people you consider your sister tells you she has breast cancer at 32 and is 5 1/2 months pregnant? Happened in 2007 and after treatment and many surgeries later (and some still to come), she is even more beautiful and stronger than ever before. And did I mention that beautiful daughter of hers?

Julie - in the fight of her life and doing wonderfully! Julie just finished her first round of chemo and is gearing up for her second when she returns to CA next week. I had the pleasure of seeing her and her 15 month old adorable little boy, Cooper, last Friday. It was amazing day and she truly inspires me.

So, make sure you check yourself this month and stop and remember those who are fighting and fought...those who have won and those who have lost. Let's hope there is a cure for this soon!

Love to all!!!

She looks beautiful...

Just checked my friend Jules' blog and the hair shaving party seems to have gone well. http://julieolsensjourney.blogspot.com/2009/07/tata-to-tresses.html

I really wish she lived closer so I could have been there for support and the festivities. Jules, your outlook is amazing, your strength is never ending and your beauty shines through with or without the hair. Miss you girl!!!

Minor Meltdown

Okay, I know this is silly and strange to post, but I had a minor meltdown this morning. Since finding out about Julie's breast cancer, I've been trying to get the nerve to perform self exams. So, today was the day I stopped procrasinating and decided to do it. I couldn't!!! I freaked out and cried instead.

I know they say ignorance is bliss, but this isn't something to be ignorant about. I remember being so upset at my Mom when she told me that she knew about her lump for over 6 months but was too scared to do anything about it. I also know that early detection saves lives, cases in point, Julie and Randi. So why can't I suck it up and do it? Am I afraid of what I may find? Well, yeah, who wouldn't be?! Or is it just being scared of what Julie is facing? Or maybe both?!

So I'm thinking that I will set the 24th of each month as my day to check. 24 is a significant number in my life (parents' birthdays and anniversary) and its a date I won't forget. Now, to just get the nerve to do it... *sigh*

Thoughts, prayers and hugs

Well, today is the day that my friend Julie's battle over cancer takes the first major step forward. She is currently at UCLA waiting for surgery for a double masectomy. She has decided not to mess around and is "shutting down the cancer playground," her words not mine. I don't blame her and would do the same thing.

Julie's attitutude and drive over the many years I have known her is something that I have always admired. She is strong, vocal and doesn't take crap from anyone...including breast cancer. Its going to be a long road for her, but her strength and the love of those who care about her will get her through this.

So, my thoughts, prayers and hugs are with Julie and her family today, tomorrow and for as long as they need them. Julie, you say others have inspired you to fight as hard as you are, but you are an inspiration now. Love you girl!!!

Prayers and Hugs Being Sent

I just found out that an old and dear friend has breast cancer. Well, she's not old in the sense of age, but in the fact that we have known each other since we were 11. I am truly saddened by this and have been crying since I found out a couple of hours ago. Looks like they may have caught it early which is very positive. I'm scared for her and what she may have to go through. Thankfully my wonderful cousin who has been through this is in touch with her to give her advice and support. My heart is breaking right now.

Please know that my thoughts, prayers and hugs are with you now and always!!! Distance doesn't matter, I'm here for you no matter what! I love you tons girl!!!

Good news, finally!

I found out yesterday that my darling cousin has been told that she is done with her treatment for breast cancer! I am completely elated that she is done and gotten through the last year and few months! She can now focus on being a mom, wife and herself again and is no longer a "cancer patient"...WOW!

Could this be the beginning of a spell of good news?! *Crosses fingers*